Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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