It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
bring money and cleavage
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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