I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
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