The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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