Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
You can't just leave with hair like that
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize