Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
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