So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
