Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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