Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
