You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
