she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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