he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
