Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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