u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
