can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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