apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
