Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Just pee around me
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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