READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
