just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
