The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
