stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the puke drawer
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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