his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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