I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize