I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i barfeds in our rink
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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