she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
