so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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