i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
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I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
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I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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