Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I am never drinking with the goths again.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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