if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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