he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize
