Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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