i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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