By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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