So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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