I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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