so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize