sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Randomize