Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
A+ Viking dick
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
