i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
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