How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
