I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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