More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
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Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Will exercising make me less horny?
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