Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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