Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
