apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize