How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
