god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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