i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
