Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i think i have two assholes
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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