Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
