yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
